Thursday, November 17, 2011

Journal Entry #6

A quote I would use to describe myself would be:


 A man is accepted into a church for what he believes and he is turned out for what he knows. — Samuel Clemens

This is true for me because of my experience moving from different churches and learning from all of them and how they function. I have participated in many different forms of christian churches; Baptist, Non-denominational christian churches, and I've also taken part in Jewish services (which proved to be the most enlightening). But this quote mostly refers to my experience in the christian faith which I spent many of my years participating in. Although I was quite young, I was fascinated with the reasoning behind the Christian faith. Being told it was the only right way, that if I did anything bad I was doomed to live an eternity in a labyrinth of a relentless inferno, I felt obligated to dedicate myself to this faith. Fear was my biggest motivation. Luckily, I was the kind of kid that asked many questions, especially when it came to religion. Sometimes I would be scolded for asking simple questions and scolded for not knowing certain stories or facts. There was always this confusion I felt whenever learning more about religion. The older I  became, the more clear so many things came to be, but it remained in my sub-conscience due to the fact that it went against what I believed. My belief blocked so many ideas and truths from me that began to be in denial. But one faithful day, I was in a church service with the teenagers and I was the youngest amongst them all. I raised my hand and asked something that went against what they were trained to believe and take as true. They laughed and mocked of course keeping their religious armor in tact as to not absorbed what was just said. I knew what I said was right because of how I felt about my ideas and what I came to realize on my own. I left the room and explained to my parents what happened and they listened. My father struggled with the same situation. He was becoming more enlightened and turned away from church because of his actual learnings. If he continued to wail church songs in the pews and throw laconic praises at the pastor everything would've been normal. But when light is shed on religion (especially Christianity) the blind tend to turn away. Knowledge isn't accepted in most churches. But those who know most about religion aren't the ones in the Sunday services. It's the man or women that is wrongly labeled an "atheist" or "heretic" which in all actuality, being a heretic isn't a bad thing. It just expresses that someone has independent thought.

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